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Be Reasonable

The Definition

If there is anything I hate it is being reasonable. Lately I've been having really bad panic attacks. Of course there is nothing wrong with me. I know it, you know it, my grandmother knows it. But I am still anxious and panic.

But people tell me Mark be "reasonable," panic attacks don't hurt you. Well I can't be reasonable; in fact I hate reasonable people.

Mothers imprison their kids with TV and computers while the wee little shavers scramble out of their playpens and crawl over everything. They put things in their mouths and create chaos, doing basically what they were put on earth for. But mommy says "Timmy quiet now, be reasonable."

Little Amy is a two year old in a grocery store next to a bunch of cans and sees it as her duty to take the labels off. "Oh honey," says mom "Don't do that." Amy responds with confusion, why at home mom praises her new skills, "Honey, don't" repeats mom, "Be reasonable."

The husband comes home see the wife on her last exhausted nerve. He says "Oh dear, not pork chops, I had them for lunch, I know you work too but I you can see my point about eating the same thing twice in a day, no tears dear, be reasonable."

A father says to his son, with much force, "Since I am paying for your college it would be preferable that you go into a line of work that your natural disposition and good nature has made you utterly unqualified to do. " "Are you smarter than your dad?" He asks. "Be reasonable."

Says the mother to her only daughter while she is picking out a wedding gown, only to have her mother point what is wrong with it. "Choose this gown dear, I listened to my mother and had a wonderful wedding, be reasonable."

A man says to his date, "I wouldn't do nothing to hurt you, besides it feels so much better without a condom. You want it to be nice for us both, be reasonable."

I guess "Reasonable," has come to mean opposite. Be calm when you want to panic, be happy when you want to cry, be stupid when your skills call on you to use your intelligence.

It means to give others confidence, while receiving none. It has come to mean keeping your own promises, but not caring when promises made to you are broken.

Be whatever you want, act how you want, but above all "be reasonable."

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